#892: Kathryn Jean Lopez

A.k.a. K-Lo or K-Low

Kathryn Jean Lopez is a nationally syndicated (United Feature Syndicate) batshit crazy columnist and blogger, former editor of National Review Online, and known colloquially as K-Lo presumably because of her obvious intellectual inferiority to the more famous J-Lo. K-Lo is deeply anti-feminist, anti-affirmative action, anti-abortion, and anti-contraception, but very much a fan of Sarah Palin and Dick Cheney (as well as George W. Bush – K-Lo’s suggestion for a post-presidential career for Bush is one we should hope he never takes seriously) and unhinged, irrational patriotism. She is known for her extraordinarily bad grammar and writing skills, which is worth pointing out since she has also claimed that correct pronounciation is an example of liberal elitism (after all, just listen to the much-admired Sarah Palin pronounce “nuclear”): “[N]o one in flyover country says Pock-i-stahn. It’s annoying.” Clearly Obama is unfit to govern.

Of course, given who she is, Lopez is not particularly fond of gay marriage, defending New York Archbishop Timothy Dolan’s attempt to liken marriage equality to North Korea: “Do not be so quick to dismiss the North Korea comparison, Mike [Potemra]. We are witnessing tyranny today that is fostered by a false sense of freedom, a tyranny that faux tolerance ferments.” Even her readers took her to task over the analogy, to which her defense was: “To dismiss the N. Korea analogy as beyond the pale is to deny the rational of the founding fathers” and “[t]oo much Team America and not enough Aristotle in these dismissals of the N. Korea analogy.” Duh. Of course, K-Lo has her own understanding of the Constitution: “We’re a nation not just where you are free to believe or not to believe; we’re a nation founded for Him – so we could praise Him, so we could do His will.” But that is not an entirely accurate summary.

She is also a polling conspiracy theorist, of the “I am not a poll conspiracy theorist. At least I don’t want to be. But …”-kind, having defended such conspiracies long before it became popular just prior the 2012 election. Back in 2008, when, according to K-Lo, God wanted you to vote McCain, there must clearly have been a conspiracy; how else could he lose so badly?

Diagnosis: Yet another one. And as dimwitted as the rest.

#891: Mark Looy

Mark Looy is Chief Communications Officer for Answers in Genesis, and as such PR manager for the Creation Museum in Kentucky, an extravagant piece of jimcrack devoted to presenting the literal creation story of the Bible (the “history book of the Universe”) as a fact, including the peaceful coexistence of humans and dinosaurs. The “Museum”, which is designed to be evangelistic, “presents the history of the Bible in a fun and entertaining way”. So you can imagine Looy saying some stupid shit from time to time, such as when he called Ben Stein a “a 21st-century Einsteinian figure”. Indeed, Looy is the go-to guy when the media want comments on and explanations of whatever nonsense the creation museum and Answers in Genesis are up to.

Looy, however, is adamant that they are doing science over at Answers in Genesis, so adamant, in fact, that you kind of suspects that he knows that he is wrong. When confronted with the fact that palaentologists don’t quite support the idea that humans and dinosaurs lived together a few centuries ago, he pointed out that “They all had to exist at the same time because they were all made on the same day. There may not be any fossil evidence showing dinosaurs and people in the same place at the same time. But it is clearly written that they were alive at the same time.” Chew on that, you silly evolutionists – you’ve overlooked one of the central claims of the earliest part of the Bible. Creationists and palaentologists use the same data, according to Looy, but different worldviews lead them to different interpretations – the creationist worldview being in particular characterized by rejecting those data, though Looy doesn’t see it that way.

After the Kansas Evolution Kangaroo Court, Looy said that “students in public schools are being taught that evolution is a fact, that they're just products of survival of the fittest … It creates a sense of purposelessness and hopelessness, which I think leads to things like pain, murder, and suicide,” an assertion he didn’t back up with evidence, and sustains a somewhat unclear link to the question of the scientific status of evolution, even if it were true.

Diagnosis: Fairly typical fanatic young-earth creationist, Looy is in fact one of the movers (though not one of the visionaries) of the young-earth creationist movement. An important figure in the battle against reason, sanity, and reality.

#890: Jody A. & Jeffrey P. Long

Jeffrey P. Long and Jody A. Long seem to be the people behind the Near Death Experience Research Foundation, together with Reverend John Price – and that last participant kinda gives the game away, doesn’t it? You can see a discussion of one of their productions here. Basically, the “organization” takes the impossibility of explaining near death experiences as axiomatic (at least they offer no even remotely plausible support for the claim), and argues NDEs prove the existence of God. The argument is, of course, trivially valid, since the existence of God is also one of the premises; indeed it is part of their definition of NDEs. According to the Longs, an NDE is “a co-created experience with the person and the divine,” which seems to mean that “this world is an illusion. We are not our physical body at all.” It all has something to do with the “soul’s purpose”, summed up by Jody Long here.

Diagnosis: Christian fundamentalism combined with new age drivel often yields fascinating results, and no less so here. Reality and evidence stand no chance when facing such onslaughts of religious bias and wishful thinking.

#889: Margaret Lofton and the creationists on the Polk County School Board

Margaret Lofton

You can sort of intuit your way to the conclusion that Zuerrnnovahh-Starr Livingstone is less than ideally hinged, and you’ll be right (the title of the article “Sylphs transmute chemtrails” gives you an idea); but Livingstone is also Canadian, and hence disqualified. Instead we’ll turn to some far less colorful, but also more typical American whackos – what’s more typical than creationists on a schoolboard?

Kay Fields

Apparently the good people of the Polk County School Board in Lakeland, FL, seem to have been relatively unaware of the Dover Trial; at least they didn’t see any problems with introducing Intelligent Design in schools. In 2007, Board members Tim Harris, Margaret Lofton and Hazel Sellers said they opposed proposed science standards for Florida schools that lists evolution and biological diversity as being among the “big ideas” students need to know for a well-grounded science education, and Board member Kay Fields said she wanted intelligent design taught in science classes in addition to evolution.

Tim Harris

“If it ever comes to the board for a vote, I will vote against the teaching of evolution as part of the science curriculum,” said Lofton, adding that “If (evolution) is taught, I would want to balance it with the fact that we may live in a universe created by a supreme being as well,” which has nothing to do with evolution and quite a bit to do with religion. “My tendency would be to have both sides shared with students since neither side can be proven,” Tim Harris said. “I don’t have a conflict with intelligent design versus evolution,” Sellers said. “The two go together,” showing, at best, that she has no idea what she is talking about. “It crosses the line with people who are Christians,” Lofton said. “Evolution is offensive to a lot of people,” and that is, apparently, her criterion for determining scientific merit.

Hazel Sellers

Their attempt to get Intelligent Design into the school curriculum was supported by efforts from Focus on the Family, and encompassed more than just Polk County. In the Highlands County four of five school board members opposed evolution, with School Board Vice Chairman Andy Tuck saying that “as a person of faith, I strongly oppose any study of evolution as fact at all. I’m purely in favor of it staying a theory and only a theory.” They passed their anti-evolution measures as well, as did at least almost a dozen other Florida school boards back in 2008, (and Florida schoolboards were certainly not alone).

Andy Tuck

Fortunately the good folks of Polk County took some beating over the issue, but their antics (and those of other school boards in other counties – school boards are often crammed with creationists due to organized campaigns by creationist organizations) led to a statewide debate on the issues, which overall seem to have gone in favor of science (at least the State Board decided to call evolution “Scientific theory” as a compromise to make everyone happy – it’s scientific, but is also just a theory …). You can read the complicated story here.

Diagnosis: The Polk County School Board can stand as a representative for anti-science, creationist-filled school boards everywhere, and there are lots of them. It’s really a deeply scary affair, for these boards wield quite a bit of local power.

#888: Dana Loesch

Dana Loesch is yet another wingnut talk radio host, Tea-partier, and (sometimes) political commentator for Fox News, CNN, CBS, ABC and HBO. For laughs, one hopes but suspects not. She was also associated with Breitbart.com, but that affair ended in some ugly lawsuits.

There is little surprising or new to tell about Loesch, really. Her views on gay rights are what you suspect; supporting gay rights is not only incompatible with Christianity, but hatred of Christianity – indeed, supporters of gay rights think “traditional marriage” is “hateful”, which is “literally [nope, she doesn’t understand what that means] calling Christ hateful;” indeed, says Loesch, “I know you hate Christ.” So it goes.

As a matter of fact, there is some suspicion around that her professed bigotry fails to reflect her private stance on LGBT issues, though the sheer lack of intellectual honesty involved in that case makes it very tempting to judge her as qualified for an entry nonetheless. She has, for instance, argued – for reals – that gay marriage is a violation of theseparation of church and state. Why that matters to her is less clear, since she apparently doesn’t believe in that separation in any case. At least the Bible figures (least officially) very centrally (borderline dominionist) in her views on politics, liberty and civil rights in general. She has apparently not actually read it.

As for the proposed 2012 Virginia law requiring transvaginal sonograms for any woman seeking an abortion, Loesch pointed out that these women “had no problem having similar to a trans-vaginal procedure when they engaged in the act that resulted in their pregnancy.” But she really went batshit on those who had the temerity to criticize her. Her comments on the Trayvon Martin case, if not quite as idiotic as those of Dan Riehl, are just sad. They do fit into her general delusion that what progressives and African Americans really want is a race war.

While not a birther, Loesch is, in fact, a birther denialist – there are no birthers at all, at least not other than the Clintons [!].

Diagnosis: Another batshit pundit. And that’s that.