Ellen Grace Jones is British, but so wonderfully ineptly insane that we can’t help mentioning her. The far less interesting Ernest Jones deserves an honorable mention for this one, though we cannot be bothered to give him a separate entry; creationist lunatic Stephen E. Jones, meanwhile, is not American either.
But Steve G. Jones is, and he is as far out there as they get – unless he knows exactly what he’s doing, which we aren’t completely going to rule out. Jones is a hypnotherapist who is behind numerous recordings and publications about hypnosis and self-awareness and – wait for it – the law of attraction, and it is hard to imagine grownups promoting the law of attraction (with any measurable success) without knowing precisely what they are doing. Jones’s background is in education, which is not a relevant field to what he is marketing but certainly relevant to promoting them effectively to appropriate audiences.
According to Jones the hypnotherapy process is a tool to inspire the subconscious self to create a positive result, which is … not how it works. He also points out to his audiences that “[t]he conscious mind tends to be skeptical and often second-guesses the suggestions,” which is, I guess, somewhat telling: To make the law of attraction work for you, you need to override any reasons or counterevidence you may be conscious of. Thinking, especially critical thinking, has a tendency to fool you into not blindly trusting Jones’s advice.
His most significant contribution is perhaps the book You Can Attract It, co-authored with Frank Mangano, whom we have encountered before, but the title of his book Total Money Magnetism: The Neuroscience of Success is possibly even more telling if you wondered what kind of person we’re dealing with here (no, Jones is not a neuroscientist by a long shot). Apparently (according to a “review” by one Johnny Latournee), the “device of Total Money Magnetism was created so that it gets rid of all the negative beliefs and thoughts from your mind and reprograms it right into a mind of wealth and success,” and it “handles the Law of self, Manifestation and Attraction-improvement.” Jones also sells you “weight loss hypnosis,” and hypnotic treatments targeted at virtually any lifestyle or health-related desire you can dream of. And a “zodiac hypnosis collection,” which combines hypnosis with astrology. And all his hypnosis is all “natural”. Wait … Jones even sells you “natural penis enlargement” … by self-hypnosis. Come on.
He has apparently made numerous TV appearances, and is a featured expert (that would be “expert”) on TruTV’s Door to the Dead.
Diagnosis: This is spam. Well, I guess it is possible that it is all an elaborate, cynical and unfunny joke. Still. Spam.