Friday, May 1, 2026

#3012: Andrea Hess

The Akashic Records are an imaginary compendium of all knowledge that some exceptionally delusional self-declared psychics claim exist on some non-physical plane. This non-physical library ostensibly contains records – indeed, “energetic records” – on everyone who exists, including their entire past and future ‘soul journey’, and said psychics will claim to be able to access your particular records for a fee. The idea has its foundations in 19th century Anthroposophy and Theosophy traditions, mixed with orientalism, vibrations and quantum woo, and it is so stupid it hurts.

 

Andrea Hess is one such psychic. Hess is the founder of “Soul Realignment®”, which is ostensibly an “intuitive, energetic healing modality that utilizes information contained in your Akashic Records to align with your soul’s purpose”. Also “[c]lear karmic patterns and restrictions, gain a better understanding of YOU, and allow your true, divine self to SHINE”. Apparently there are a number of practitioners of Soul Realignment out there, suggesting that there is, in fact, some money in this nonsense (you can peruse the website of an acolyte, one Iris Emmy, here, for instance).

 

Diagnosis: Intelligent people believe stupid things, but if you buy into this shit, you are not intelligent. Sorry.

 

3 comments:

  1. I read a book a long time ago called "Spears of Destiny" by Trevor Ravenscroft, which was extremely interesting. The book, of course, is completely fictional, but it purports to be the story of the spear that pierced Jesus on the cross.

    Ravenscroft even invented an encounter with Walter Johannes Stein, a student of the founder of anthroposophy, Rudolf Steiner. I even got hold of a few of Steiner's books, including "Spiritual Science". When I finally read it, I knew as much about "spiritual science" as I did before reading it - nothing. It's such nonsense with such nonsensical sentence constructions that it makes your head spin.

    I think the only more nonsensical books I've read are those by Judith Butler.

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    1. Decades ago, National Geographic had an article with illustrations about one of the Crusades, where a fanatical "visionary" found a spearpoint that was rather corroded.
      It was used to rally the troops against the "heathens."
      NG had the whole story published as true, and even had praise for the guy who found the spearpoint, and the armies that slaughtered thousands.
      This is how fanatics operate.

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