Saturday, December 13, 2014

#1238: Terry Watkins

If you think Jack Chick is on the crazy side, you may not be familiar with the glorious antics of Dial-the-truth ministries, run by Terry Watkins. No, seriously; this is pretty much as insane as the Internet gets. The organization started up in 1990 as a telephone ministry with “inspirational” recorded messages (mostly incoherent hatred) for the caller. The organization, based in Pinson, Alabama, is notable for their King James Onlyism, and possibly most famous for their hardline stance on rock music – it’s evil, pure and simple (“tools of Satan”), and due to the Biblical instruction “Be ye not unequally yoked with unbelievers" (II Corinthians 6:14), that verdict applies to Christian rock as much as mainstream rock (look at that webdesign! You can’t but take them seriously). Less surprisingly, the site criticizes Britney Spears as a “whorish woman” who provokes “youthful lusts” and parents who allow their children to listen to the Spice Girls as “co-conspirators in this cultural rape of their daughters.” No, they don’t really keep up with the “developments” in pop music, but I suppose that’s heartily unnecessary for their message. Lyndon Larouche associate Donald Phau’s classic The Satanic Roots of Rock makes an appearance on their site as well.

Interestingly, they also believe that Hell is a physical place. No, it’s not just a place, but geographically located down there, in the core of the Earth. One of Satan’s forms on Earth is Santa (I suppose even a kid should be able to figure out that anagram). He uses that form because he preys on the weak, such as children … and others – Watkins draws our attention to “The great German Reformer, Martin Luther writ[ing] in his Table Talks: ‘The devil plagues and torments us in the place where we are most tender and weak. In Paradise, he fell not upon Adam, but upon Eve’.” Watkins actually claims to prove that Santa is Satan. And yes, the proof is in that anagram (anagrams are heathen word magic). But Watkins somehow manages to make the argument even sillier than it initially sounds: “An internet Google search on ‘Satan Claus’ [not Santa Claus – but SATAN Claus] found over 1,700 hits!” Can’t argue with that. In fairness, he provides references. To Constance Cumbey and Texe Marrs, Madame Blavatsky and Gail Riplinger. And to clinch it, “[i]s ‘Claus’ another anagram for ‘Lucas’? It’s no secret ‘Lucas’ and ‘Lucis’ is a new-age ‘code word’ for ‘Lucifer’” (actually, it’s the real name of the Evangelist Luke, but that fact doesn’t fit so we disregard it.) And, not content with these observations, he also pulls the Jack Skellington inference “‘Claus’ sounds a lot like ‘claws’.” You can’t top this. Actually, Watkins does arguably top this. I strongly recommend you to check out the article yourself. And don’t get him started on Halloween.

(One interesting detail is that Watkins swallows whole everything ever written by Silver Ravenwolf or any other New Age witch – not a critical question asked – and then takes it as proof of the workings of Satan.)

He didn’t like the Da Vinci code, either (“the most blatant mainstream attack on the Lord Jesus Christ in modern times! Nothing comes close”), nor Mel Gibson’s The Passion of the Christ. Both verdicts are by all means understandable, but you sort of get the feeling that to Watkins hatred is a default reaction. I am unfamiliar with the movie “Saved!” but according to Watkins it is “[o]ne of the most hateful and blatant attacks on Bible Believing Christians […] This is beyond belief!”

Dial-the-Truth Ministries has also written engagingly on the purported link between the number “11”, 9/11, and – you guessed it – the Endtimes (at least the end of “America the great” – just look at the Muslim atheist in the White House). You really have to check it out, and no – it’s not a Poe. The article on Hurricane Katrina is not without its moments either. And here he tackles environmentalism, pointing out the “scientific ignorance” of environmentalism and urging us to pollute as much as possible, since there is plenty of evidence that this is what Jesus would have done. At least he admits that the goal is, indeed, to destroy the world, and that this is the main reason why environmentalism is unchristian.

He also has a nice, elegant little proof of the historical accuracy of the death and resurrection of Jesus. The only premise you have to commit to is the literal accuracy of the Bible.

Diagnosis: Absolutely hysterical, in every sense. Though an abysmally unappealing character, the world would have been much the poorer without Terry Watkins.


  1. I cited this very helpful post on my blog post on one of Watkins' tracts at the blog for The Museum of Weird and Demented Religious Tracts Cheers

  2. rock & roll was my god, also its name has some history but the more modern take is this

    By the 1920s, “rocking and rolling” became a popular double entendre referring to either dancing or sex. Trixie Smith’s 1922 blues ballad, “My Man Rocks Me (With One Steady Roll)” may be the first use of the phrase in a song.

    sex is the keyword or rock & roll describing the sex act.

    shall we delve into many of the songs? oh, let's go there.

    how about Motley Crue's girls girls girls, or maybe Mungo Jerry in the summertime, or Steve Miller the joker, maybe Def Leppard pour some sugar on me, Ted Nugent wang dang sweet poontang, Aerosmith love in an elevator, Bob Seger night moves, what about Rod Stewart do ya think I'm sexy, or tonight's the night, Bad Company feel like makin love, ACDC shook me all night long, Starland Vocal Band afternoon delight, Led Zeppelin whole lotta love, I can go on with the sexual innuendo of rock & roll for quite some time, an offshoot disco and Donna Summer love to love you baby and I feel love,

    and you think Terry Watkins is off his rocker? because he speaks out against such things? well, what about the women portrayed in all those rock songs are they not being portrayed as pieces of meat for men's pleasure? have you seen the video for girls girls girls? careful now how you answer you might be viewed by many women as misogynistic depending on how you answer but if you are a typical male you won't give a rats behind what anyone thinks of you.

    tell me what happened to the greatest empire the world had ever known? the Roman Empire? did they not implode from their own vice?

    as for Britney Speers, even the media branded her a train wreck!

    ah, some very true words... evil men and seducers shall wax worse and worse deceiving and being deceived.

    the 60s and 70s for me were characterized by sex, drugs, and rock& roll many men are pigs their thing to bed as many women as possible because strange is always more exciting than the same old ball and chain.

    and anyone who comes along and tries to upset the apple cart is a crazy loon!!! well, when your apple cart treats women as nothing more than pieces of meat, sex machines, something to be used and discarded then your apple cart needs to be upset.

  3. I remember this when I was a kid growing up in Alabama. All my fiends and I would call this and listen late at night and laugh at it. I can’t believe this is still around